Dear President Trump,

(Okay. Writing that made me throw up in my mouth a little bit.)

Dear White House Intern,

(Much better.)

I suspect that millions of us Americans spent a lot of time banging our heads against the nearest vertical surface during this past election. Those of us who still have a few brain cells to rub together would like you to know something: You’re not fooling us. Americans are smarter than you give us credit for. You are going to be the most scrutinized President in U.S. history. And you’re going to be remembered as the wannabe dictator who failed to destroy our democracy. Stew on that for a while.

Alright. That’s all for now. Have fun in your fantasy world. I hear “Finding Dory” is good. Much more riveting than, say, intelligence briefings.




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